I don't outwardly broadcast this information, but a few months ago we decided to bottle-feed Aubrey. Because of the medication Mommy is on (and can't really get off of), I decided I didn't want to pass on that medication and any of its possible side effects to Aubrey through breastmilk after consulting with my OB. I was hoping to breastfeed, mostly so I could get that bonding time with her, and I was disappointed when he told me the side effects she could experience. But I made a decision that I thought was in her best interest.
However, once I made that decision, it seemed we started getting more and more opinions on it. It was much like the c-section thing. Everyone had an opinion. Most of these opinions were from people who weren't aware of my heart condition, and of course, once I snapped at them and told them about it, they backed off. But I kept hearing comments like "oh, I've heard that's not a good way to have a baby." Or "OH, so you're having her the easy way?" (Side note: From the recovery I've been going through, I can testify to the fact that a c-section certainly is NOT an easy way. Not in the slightest.) I'm the kind of person who soaks up comments like that and lets them get to me. I feel guilty like I'm somehow being an inadequate mother or letting her down already. It's amazing to me the gall people have to just spout out opinions without seeming to care.
But the opinions and judgment didn't just come from outsiders. When we were in the hospital, believe it or not, they came from the OB nurses who cared for me and Aubrey. And even in the hospital room...in my bathroom there was this huge poster from La Leche League detailing why breastfeeding is best and why bottles are bad. Not something I'd necessarily want to see when I'm already insecure about it.
But the thing that has really surprised me and irritated me is the lack of information about it. When you breastfeed, they provide lactation consultants to help you and give you information on what to do, how to do it, etc. But with formula, they just gave us a case of formula and we were just to feed her. No guidance, nothing. She took to the formula okay in the hospital, but when we got home, we switched her from the pre-made liquid she got at the hospital to different brands we received in samples in the mail that were in powdered form. Last Wednesday we were up all night with her crying, just inconsolable, and spitting up everything she ate. The poor thing...you could tell she was in pain every time she spat up. It broke my heart, and it also freaked me out, being a new mother. When we called the doctor the next day we were told that apparently we weren't feeding her enough (we were going off the limited information on how much to feed her we received in the hospital) and told to just go back to what she had in the hospital. So T and I took to the Internet, trying to find any and all information we could get. But there isn't much out there.
It's just frustrating because of the lack of information out there for formula-fed babies. I hate that right now I have to just try different types to see what she likes because, well, she's suffering in the meantime. It's not like she can look at me and say "hey, Mom...this formula? Not making me feel so good." Doctors don't really know that much about formula or at least mine doesn't, and it would have been immensely helpful if, while at the hospital, we got some kind of information on what to do and what to expect.
So I'll get off my soapbox for the time being. But I needed to complain. Are there any others out there who share the same frustration? Just curious or maybe I'm being crazy...it wouldn't be the first time, that's for sure :-)
Today Aubrey is getting her professional pictures done for announcements. I'll be sure to share those when we get them!