What am I doing?
Seriously...what am I doing?
This past weekend I kept asking myself that same question over and over. It was a tough parenting weekend. Hell, it's been a tough parenting couple of weeks. Aubrey has been so moody lately, so fussy, just plain rotten. And sure, every parent says that, and yes, I've had people tell me "oh wait until she's 2...or 3..." Yeah, well, this phase sucks, too. And Mommy and Daddy are just about broken from it.
It's the constant tantrums if we take something away from her. The bucking bronco thing. The constant crying. Dear God, the crying. And we can't take her anywhere without her fussing...out to dinner, to Target, to church...this past weekend we tried to go to mass where I spent half of it at least in the outer gathering room, part of that period of time in tears. I couldn't figure it out. Why was she crying? I let her walk, she was upset. I let her sit with me, she was upset. Crawl, upset. Sit in her stroller, upset. No idea. And I was just about to lose it. Where was my little girl who is always so happy?
Bath time for the past five nights have just been terrible. Screaming like we are torturing her, as one of us holds her in the tub while the other cleans her, as she tries to claw her way out of the tub or throw herself back directly into the water. I can't remember a time when we had a good bath night.
It's hard to get her to understand that "no, don't do that Aubrey" even though we say it. And I hate to say I have raised my voice, as has T. The girl doesn't understand punishment. It's not like I could take something away from her, and she would understand it was a consequence of her behavior. Instead we just wrestle with her as we get her ready for bed.
She's teething, getting two of her molars at once. We try to stay on top of it with orajel and tylenol. But she's also transitioning to toddlers so she's more active, doing more during the day, probably more tired, and she's around toddlers now. Could she be picking up behaviors? Is she upset with us over the change?
The thing is I don't know. I just don't know. And I have no idea what I'm doing
So yeah, I know...it gets worse, I know. But that doesn't help at the moment. Right now, I'm considering just giving in and waving the white flag.