Cleaning out my closet

I have been trying to pretend that it didn't exist or that perhaps I could just forget about it.  But it must be dealt with.  What's that? 

 

 

Oh, just the thousands of dollars in Mary Kay crap sitting in my den closet. 

 

 

Just those pink boxes of stuff reminding me of the mistakes I made and how much I wish I never decided to join that venture.  Just that stuff. 

 

 

See, the company buys back the inventory you still have in stock that you have purchased over the past year but only the last year.  Unfortunately, that isn't when I made the bulk of the purchases that are still sitting unsold in my closet.  So what do I do with the rest of it?  Well, liquidate it.  For pennies on the dollar basically.  I can try my best to get something back and recoup my losses.  Key word is try. 

 

 

I have gotten a check back from the company for the stuff I could sell back.  It was a decent amount, but I still have a ton of inventory to clear out.  I've gone through items that I want or stuff I know that friends or family would want and I'll give that to them for free.  The other stuff I want out.  And ideally I'd like to clear it out as soon as possible because I can just move on from this mess.  Well...no, not really move on, but start to move on.  We'll move on once that debt is paid off. 

 

 

So yesterday I collected and accounted for every item I still have and sent a spreadsheet listing it to a liquidation place that was recommended to me.  Once I hear back from them, I will ship them off and that will be it.  Thank. God. 

 

 

I know this post is coming off as kind of angry, and well, that's because I am kind of angry.  Angry with myself and angry that I let myself get sucked in and tricked into the idea of "you can't sell from an empty cart."  For those not familiar with the site, I've recently discovered pinktruth.com.  It was created by women who have gone through similar situations like me if not worse.  Some women are well into the ten thousands or more into debt, some have lost their marriages...I mean, I'm not even making it up.  It is that bad.  And Mary Kay is just one of the multi-level marketing schemes out there. 

 

Once you sign the dotted line they then try to get you to purchase inventory.  "You can't sell from an empty cart!" so you are encouraged to buy a store full of products so that when a customer orders from you, they won't have to wait.  They have quarterly "star" goals where if you purchase a certain amount in wholesale inventory ($1,600, $2,800, $3,200) and so on, you get a prize.  I got a Fossil watch once, which was awesome, except essentially it was a $2,800 watch.  When you get rewarded for being the "queen of sales" or so on, it's not really for how much you sell.  It's for how much inventory you purchase.  Not really the same thing, right? 

 

 

So I'm counting how many of each lipstick shade I have on hand thinking "what in God's name made me think that I needed three of each?  Seriously?" 

 

 

While my director or recruiter never ever said this to me, I have read it in online company training material and have heard it at conferences.  "It's better to ask for forgiveness than ask for permission."  They essentially have this motto of leaving your husband out.  Now not all consultants will follow this, but it's true.  I did the same thing, whether intentionally or not.  I didn't tell T how much I was getting and how much I was making.  I wanted to show him that I could make it work and "hey, look how much money I made our family!"  BUT, the thing is, I'm not good at business, and I kept digging myself further and further in the hole.  It got to the point where I then kept it from T because I was ashamed and wanted to fix it on my own.  You know what this is called?  I didn't until I read it on one of these sites:  financial infidelity.  It sounds harsh but true.  I lied and kept a huge and expensive secret from T.  The hole was dug deeper and deeper.  Until I came clean.  And now we're getting ourselves out of MY mess. 

 

 

I feel awful about it because it is just that, MY mess.  Money I cost our family.  Money that we have to use in our budget to pay off a loan and credit card.  We're both making sacrifices and will need to for quite some time, but we should not be required to do that.  It should be just me. 

 

 

So yes, this post is pretty negative.  Sorry guys....I figured that when it gone down to it and I had to take that last step in getting everything together.  And it's like the stages of grief, right?  I suppose you could say I'm in the anger phase. 

 

What's the next step?  Anyone?